


not that type

by tzushi



Category: The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, But she doesn't know that, F/F, Internalized Homophobia, clem just wants a girlfriend, louis comes in clutch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 07:00:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19458805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tzushi/pseuds/tzushi
Summary: Everything about Violet was perfect, head to toe. Clementine couldn't stop herself from staring at the girl every time she had the chance.But don't get her wrong, Clementine wasn't gay.(aka clem as a crush on violet and needs some help figuring that out)





	not that type

Violet was perfect in every way. Every. Single. Way. From her soft, short, blonde hair that Clementine longed to run her fingers through, to her perfect smooth skin that Clementine wanted to spend hours touching and tracing patterns on. Clementine wanted to hold Violet’s perfect face in her hands and get lost in her beautiful green eyes until she couldn’t keep her eyes open anymore.

But Clementine wasn’t gay. No way. She didn’t like girls, she wasn’t like that. Clementine was attracted the boys- she had to be. Why else would she have dated Gabriel for that one week when they were both thirteen? She liked boys. That was that. She just simply admired Violet, that was all. It was a simple admiring of a friend.

Not that there was anything wrong with being gay! Violet was gay and Clementine was just fine with that. Brody and Sophie, two of Clementine’s best friends, were also dating, and she fully supported them. Nothing was wrong with it. Clementine just... wasn’t it. She couldn’t be. And that was fine.

The ping of her phone brought Clementine back from her thoughts, the small girl letting out a groan. She opened her eyes, the sunlight streaming in through her window momentarily blinding her. Pushing herself up, she grabbed her phone from her nightstand and checked her notifications, seeing a new message in her friend group’s groupchat.

**loulou:** hey guys  
wanna hang out today ;*  
we should go to the beach! summer has begun it’s time to be teens

As Clementine began to respond, she got a new message.

**victoryvi:** yeah sure  
its not like i have anything better to do  
literally

Clementine hated the fact that her heartbeat began to pick up at the thought of spending time with Violet, the way it skipped a beat at the fact that she would probably see Violet in a swimsuit.

She just admired Violet's body, that was all. Clementine has no malicious intent when she says that Violet doesn't do much to keep in shape. She usually would just sit on the couch all day, all she ate were chicken nuggets from McDonald's, and yet she still had a flat stomach and toned muscles. Clementine just wished she could achieve that type of body without having to do all of the exercise she did daily, without eating the disgustingly healthy concoctions that Lee created and made her eat.

**clem!:** sure!  
let's do it  
i have nothing to do all day either haha

 **rat hair:** Yep!  
I'll drive us down in the van as long as you let me take Rosie with us  
I know Clem's kinda scared of her but maybe they can get along together

 **clem!:** i don't really have a choice right?

 **rat hair:** Nope!  
I'll pick you all up at Lou's house at noon  
If you're coming with us then show up there

 **victoryvi:** alrighty then  
meet you at the mansion

 **loulou:** yes children. come on down to my mansion. i have snacks

 **victoryvi:** u know what? i don't think i can go anymore

Clementine let out an involuntary laugh when she read Violet's text before checking the time. 10:30. She had an hour and a half to get ready and head down to Louis' house, but knowing Marlon he was probably going to be half an hour late as per usual. With a sigh, she sat up and pushed herself out of bed, deciding to get ready for the day.

**~**

Now, Clementine was a fairly headstrong girl. She was very decisive, she rarely hesitated, her confidence was soaring. But when she was in front of Violet, it was like all of that crumbled away and all she became was a coward who tried so hard to make Violet smile and laugh. She stumbled over her words, found herself going silent for long periods of time just to listen to Violet’s smooth voice, stuttering out vague compliments to the girl just to see her face flush red.

But best friends did that all the time. They got nervous in front of each other. They liked making each other smile and laugh. Their legs always felt like jelly and their hearts always pounded in their chest whenever they made eye contact with each other. Right?

So when Clementine arrived at Louis' mansion (no, she would not stop calling it that), and found that only Violet had arrived, wearing only a bathing suit, she became quite nervous and quiet. Louis, who was also only wearing his swim trunks, instantly picked up on her strange silence, quirking an eyebrow.

"What's up, Clem? Why are you so quiet?" he asked letting out a laugh. "I've known you for six months and I think this is the first time I've seen you without your confident, 'don't fuck with me' aura."

Clementine quirked an eyebrow, only retorting with, "Coming from you that means nothing. You don't know silence."

Violet's lips turned up at the corner at Clementine's words and that made her heart swell with pride.

She was just happy to make her friend laugh. That was all. She loved making all of her friends smile, so why was Violet any different?

Before Clementine could dig herself deeper into this pit of thinking about Violet, there was a knock at the door that caught the attention of the other three. The door opened later and they heard the bark of a dog- Rosie- followed by Marlon's voice.

"Hey guys! We're here now," he called as he peeked his head in. "I saw Aasim, Ruby, Mitch and Brody as they were walking down the street together so I picked them up on the way. They're all waiting in the van."

Violet laughed. "Is there enough room in that car for all of us?"

"Nope," came Marlon's simple reply. "But we'll cram you all in. We're gonna make it to the beach in one van. I'm taking on this challenge."

Clementine nodded her head. "I'm fine as long as I don't need to sit next to the demon-dog," she said, not wanting to draw said animal's attention by saying her name. Louis rolled his eyes.

"Don't refer to Mitch like that. He may be a demon and lack enough braincells to be a human, but nickname's aren't funny," he said with a teasing smile on his face.

"Oh, ha ha. You're a fuckin' comedian, Lou," Violet responded instead of Clementine, rolling her eyes. "Let's just get going."

**~**

As the group rode to the beach, all cramped up in Marlon's van that smelled like wet dog, Clementine couldn't stop herself from thinking about Violet. There weren't enough seats for all of them to sit in separately, so Clementine was oh-so luckily placed on top of Violet's lap. Clementine's heart was pounding in her chest. She was so close to Violet.

But friends always felt this nervous when they sat this close to each other, right? It was weird sitting on your friend's lap, no matter what the circumstances were. Even if Clementine was sitting on Louis or Brody, her heart would be pounding this hard in her chest and it would still be this hard for her to breathe normally. It was just an awkward situation to be put in.

Soon enough they pulled into the parking lot at the beach, which was surprisingly empty on such a nice day during the beginning of summer. They quickly piled out of the van, desperate to breathe in some fresh air that didn't smell and taste like wet dog and that hadn't been exhaled from someone else.

But even still, Clementine's heart was pounding in her chest. She still felt so nervous and awkward, and she couldn't stop stealing glances at the blonde girl who was standing a few feet away from her, giggling about something with Brody and Ruby.

God, she needed to do something about this. Talk to someone about it. Let out these strange feelings she had. So while the others all ran down to a small spot on the beach and began to set up, Clementine pulled here most trusted confidant to the side, away from the others.

“Hey Lou,” Clementine quietly called, voice shaky, “Can I talk to you?”

Louis glanced over, seeming to instantly know that something was wrong by Clementine’s demeanor. Placing his hands on his hips, he smirked, “Has my beach bod finally swooned you over?” he tried for a joke, Clementine barely even offering him a smile. He pressed his lips into a thin line, frowning. “What’s up, Clem?”

Clementine’s eyes flickered to the sand beneath her as she started picking up some grains in her hand. Louis gingerly took a seat beside her, worriedly looking over her face.

“You and Marlon are best friends, right?” she slowly asked, beginning to trace patterns into the sand. Louis let out a hum as he nodded his head, turning his gaze to the lake in front of him. “Have you ever wanted to, uhm... kiss him?”

Louis’ eyes immediately widened as he looked to Clementine in shock. “What?!” he asked loudly, the girl jumping at his sudden raise in volume. “No! We’re _friends_ , Clem. Why would I want to kiss him? I mean, I know I’m pan but this is a stretch!”

Clementine bit her lip, shutting her eyes as she let out a small exhale. “Okay. Alright. Thanks, Lou,” she muttered, her mind only racing more than it was before. Louis furrowed his eyebrows.

“Are you alright?” he worriedly asked, his shock quickly dying down because Clementine was acting so different than usual. “What’s up?”

Clementine shook her head side to side. “I don’t know,” she muttered, because at this point she genuinely didn’t. “I’m just... confused.”

“You know you can talk to me about anything, right? I’m here for you. I can be serious when I need to be, Clem.”

The girl nodded her head and they fell into a short silence. It was broken when Clementine took in a shaky breath, grabbing all the confidence she could muster at the moment.

“Sometimes I think about kissing Violet,” she started, still refusing to meet Louis’ eyes. “Sometimes I really want to. But I don’t. Because I’m not gay. I don’t like girls. So why do I want to kiss her?”

Yet another silence fell between them as Louis searched for how to respond, crossing his legs. “Clem,” he muttered, “I want to help you, but it isn’t my place to tell you what you are or aren’t. But you shouldn’t be so against liking another girl. Are you homophobic, or something?”

“No! No, never,” Clementine instantly defended herself, shaking her head side to side. “I’m not. I’m fully supportive of Violet, and Brody and Sophie, and you too! But- but for _me_... it’s different. I don’t know.”

Louis puffed out his cheeks before they deflated with a sigh. “Clem... don’t think about it like that. Don’t think about labels. Just think about who you like and who you want to be with. Gender doesn’t matter at all. If you like Violet, that’s perfectly fine. And if you don’t, that’s okay too. But don’t overthink it. You have your whole life ahead of you to figure out who you are, who you like. Give it time. Take it slowly. It’ll all work out in the end.”

Clementine blinked once. Then again. A third time. And suddenly there were tears in her eyes, which immediately set Louis into a panic.

“Oh- oh _shit_! Clem, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you cry! What did I say?” the words tumbled out of his mouth as he quickly pulled the girl into a hug.

Clementine could only manage to shake her head side to side as she let out a small sob, bringing her hand to her mouth.

“No, Lou, it’s not you,” she said in a wavering voice. “I’m just... so relieved... I’ve been thinking about this for so long, and I’ve kept it inside of me for so long, and to let it out and hear you say that... it feels so much better.”

Louis tightened his arms around the girl, letting out a gentle laugh. “I love you, Clem. So much. I’m glad I could help you,” he honestly stated as a smile graced his lips. They stayed like that for a few more seconds before they heard a shriek, instantly looking to the side where the others were fooling around.

Marlon was chasing Ruby and Aasim around with a water gun, spraying the freezing lake water on them as Rosie bounded around behind him. The others only watched in amusement, and Clementine took note of how Violet had a smug smirk on her face as she had her arms crossed, her biceps showing.

Okay. So maybe she wasn’t completely straight. Maybe. Only maybe.

“Let’s go join ‘em, yeah?” Louis said as he stood up, dusting off his legs before holding out a hand to Clementine. She took it with a smile and he pulled her up to her feet, and together they headed over to the others.

**~**

The day quickly turned into night, but the friends were still at the beach and fooling around with each other. Daylight was replaced with the sunset, which the teens all decided to sit down and watch as they talked to each other about anything and everything. When the sun had set, they all went to the snack shack that was close by to the spot where they set up and ordered some small snacks to have for dinner.

After that, they all split up into small groups. Ruby and Aasim went down to the shoreline and were picking up seashells and showing them to each other, laughing and making each other smile the whole time. Mitch and Marlon were playing with Rosie, throwing a stick into the water and having Rosie go in and fetch it as they talked about their lives and their futures. Brody and Violet were sitting down on their towels in a comfortable silence.

Louis glanced to Clementine, quirking an eyebrow. He nodded his head towards Violet.

"Wanna talk to her about it?" he asked, placing his hands on his hips. "You don't have to talk about your feelings. It just might be better to open up to a lesbian rather than some pan guy who's never dated a boy in his life," he stated with a laugh.

Clementine nervously bit her lip, looking between Louis and Violet. She let out a small sigh, placing her head in her hands. "I don't know, Lou," she shakily muttered. "I don't... I don't know if I'm gay. That's not me. I don't want to come out to her and then come back later and say, 'oh yeah, I'm not actually gay by the way, just really sexually confused because you're hot and my teenage hormones want me dead'."

Louis smirked. "So you think she's hot?"

The girl flared her nostrils at the boy's words, rolling her eyes. "Okay, fine. I'll talk to her. Anything to get away from you."

Louis placed a hand over his heart, faking a pout as he examined Clementine's face. "You don't really mean that Clem, do you? You can't mean that. We're best friends. You trust me with anything!"

"Shut up, Lou," she sighed exasperatedly. She turned her attention to Violet and Brody, clearing her throat before heading over to the two. Instantly, her confidence faded when Violet's emerald green eyes landed on her and she fell at a loss for words.

"Uh, Vi, I was uhm- well, I-"

"Clem needs to talk to you," he stated, jabbing his thumb to the girl. He glanced to Brody and offered her a smile. "I'll graciously offer you my presence while you wait for her to come back."

Brody let out a fake sigh. "Alright, Louis, let's get this over with then."

"Ouch. That hurts."

Violet stood up and Louis took her spot with a laugh, the blonde worriedly looking over Clementine's face, just like how Louis had earlier.

"Everything alright, Clementine?" she questioned, pressing her lips into a frown. Clementine's heart skipped a beat but she tried to ignore it, just like she was ignoring the butterflies that had been fluttering around her stomach for the entire day.

"Uh, yeah," she responded, nodding her head, but she knew Violet didn't buy it. "Wanna do something?" she quickly offered, desperately wanting to change the topic.

Violet smiled and nodded her head. "Sure," she responded, grabbing Clementine's hand and gently tugging her a bit further from everyone. Clementine tried to ignore the fact that her hand was definitely sweaty and that Violet definitely felt it and would probably think that Clementine was a weirdo with extremely sweaty hands.

They stopped a fair distance away from the others, Violet taking a seat on the sand. She quickly grabbed Clementine's hand, tugging her down so she would sit beside her.

"Let's look at the stars," Violet suggested in her light, soft voice and Clementine found herself instantly agreeing without a second thought. Violet laid down on her back so Clementine followed her, eyes looking over the dark night sky with the bright stars lighting it up. She couldn't stop herself from sneaking a glance at the girl beside her before directing her attention back to the sky.

"Do you know any constellations?" Clementine asked, trying to distract herself from the pretty girl that was oh-so close to her. Violet laughed in response.

"A few," she stated, nodding her head. "Only the obvious ones, though. Like Cassiopeia and the Big Dipper. The others ones are just lost on me."

Clementine laughed, something she tended to a lot when she was around Violet. "Don't worry, I don't know any, so you automatically know more than I do."

Violet smiled, turning her head to the side to look at Clementine. Said girl immediately felt her face flush red as she glanced to the side, meeting Violet's eyes.

No matter how many times she saw that girl's gorgeous eyes, they would always stun her into silence.

"So," Violet started, and the dread began to fill Clementine's stomach as she knew what was coming, "What did you want to talk to me about? I know Lou was being serious when he said you wanted to say something."

Clementine nervously swallowed the lump that appeared in her throat, shutting her eyes to make this easier on herself. She knew that if she saw Violet's face while she said this, she wouldn't be able to get anything out.

She took in a shaky breath before getting the words out. "How did you know you liked girls?" she quietly asked and she was met by silence. She was scared- scared that Violet was suddenly angry, that she had gotten up and walked away.

"I'm not sure," came Violet's soft reply, her voice a lot more calmer than usual. Clementine warily opened her eyes to see Violet's eyebrows furrowed in thought, lips pressed into a thin line. The expression was cute. Violet glanced back up and met Clementine's eyes once more. "I think the thing that gave it away was my feelings for Minerva, Sophie's sister. When I was younger- twelve, I think- I always got so nervous around her. More nervous than I did around other people, especially boys. Whenever I was near her I felt to nervous, I felt butterflies in my stomach every time I was near her. And it took some time, but then it hit me. I liked her. And I realized that I never felt that way around a boy."

It was strange at how everything that Violet described was exactly what Clementine felt when she was around Violet. And as much as she hated to admit it to herself, maybe... maybe she did like girls.

While she did feel that way around boys sometimes, she also felt that way around girls. And yes, she was scared to admit that to herself- she was absolutely terrified- but at the same time it felt good to actually admit it to herself. It felt good to stop pushing those thoughts away, to stop convincing herself that she wasn't attracted to girls.

Clementine nervously bit her bottom lip, examining Violet's face. She looked so pretty. So, so pretty. She wanted to let Violet know that, but she couldn't.

"Why are you asking?" Violet slowly asked, but Clementine saw in the girl's eyes that she already knew the reason. Why else would Clementine have asked, anyways? But Clementine only just admitted it to herself, she doubted she could admit it out loud. That was just too much for her to say.

The blonde seemed to understand Clementine's silence. An unfamiliar look entered her eyes as she examined the girl's face. Slowly, she brought a gentle hand to the side of Clementine's face, rolling onto her side.

Slowly, Violet started leaning forwards, and Clementine didn't stop her. She didn't pull away. She didn't want to. So she let Violet close the distance between them, eyes fluttering shut as the blonde gently kissed her. It took her a moment, shocked even though she saw it coming, but Clementine kissed the girl back, slowly, unsure of herself.

When they pulled apart, they both fell into another silence. A sudden smile grew on Violet's face, her face flushing red as she let out a small laugh.

"Shit," she breathed out, and a smile grew on Clementine's face too. They both began to laugh; it started out as small giggling, before it fell into full fledged laughing, smiles gracing their lips. "I wasn't expecting you to kiss me back," Violet stated as their laughter died down.

"I wasn't expecting you to kiss me in the first place," Clementine responded, and her cheeks hurt from how hard she was smiling. "I'm... I'm glad, Vi. Thank you."

Violet wrapped her arms around Clementine's waist, pulling her in for a small hug. "I guess we have a lot to talk about then, huh? Apparently you're attracted to girls."

Clementine felt her face slightly flush at those words. "This is a first for me," she genuinely stated, bringing a hand to Violet's face as she traced circles on the girl's cheek, "But... I think I do."

Because god, Clementine had been fighting off these thoughts for so long. She deserved to be able to say this. She deserved to be able to finally come out and let these words out.

"I like girls, too."

**Author's Note:**

> yes i wrote this in one day no i didnt proofread it. what about it?
> 
> please be nice i've never written a fic for twd before :(( anyways i love clem with my whole heart. i would lay down my life for her .  
> anyways thank u for reading <3 please leave some constructive criticism so i can know what you liked and what i can work on! love u  
> 


End file.
